Last week somebody requested that we write a blog about staying calm in stressful situations. And this is a very interesting subject.
There is a lot to be said about how the body experiences stress, and the way that this is triggered in the body. You might like to read these blog posts too if you would like to know more about the stress response. LINK
‘Stressful Situations’
So what are the many situations that a person can find stressful, depending on their life situation?:
- Job interviews
- Social situations
- Speaking on the telephone
- Driving or being driven in a car
- Confrontations with a boss
- Disagreements in a relationship
- Financial stress and worrying about paying the bills
And I’m sure you can think of more.
So each ‘stressful situation’ is different. And the way that we all react in these situations is different.
Not all of us feel nervous and stressed when it comes to job interviews. Some people actually really enjoy interviews, and thrive on them. Now,
the situation isn’t different, is it? It’s what that person makes of the situation that is different.
We have all been to parties where we might not have had the best time because of the frame of mind we were in, but other people who went had a great time! The party was still the same but the experience was different.
So it’s about understanding how you as a person ‘processed’ that event. The way that we process what happens to us is based on our beliefs, ideas, values and experiences. Our unconscious mind (which is the bit that looks after our behaviours) runs on programmes – so our system is programmed to deal with certain situations in certain ways.
And because there is a programme, that means the programme can change. And this idea of knowing that there is something we can do differently to change a situation is very empowering.
Why Do People Treat Me This Way?
In any type of stressful situation that involves other people, we cannot directly affect the way that other people act, but we can have an impact on the way that people treat us, by looking at the way we behave.
What do people know they can ‘get away with’, with us?
What boundaries have we set?
How do we deal with it if somebody asks us to do something we don’t want to do? Do we end up agreeing because we want to please them, then wish we hadn’t because we haven’t pleased ourselves at all?
When we say ‘no’ does it mean no?
So the key to change is about how you react in a situation, not necessarily the situation itself. And this will in turn affect how you perceive the situation
I use Hypnotherapy and/or NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) to enable people to understand the way they react in certain situations and then help them to create lasting change. This change means that they can cope with anything and anybody, while remaining calm and in control. The way that you are treated changes as a result of the way that you interact within a situation.
If you would like to know more about how we can help you to remain calm, relaxed and in control, contact us.
Hayley Jones
Hypnotherapist, NLP Master Practitioner and Herbalist
